About a week ago my lower back went into a muscle spasm that has left me leaning to my right from my waist up. It looks weird and is very painful. The cure for these back episodes is similar to the cure for the common cold: rest for 7 to 10 days. Medicine doesn’t much help. Stretching is futile. Doctors usually prescribe muscle relaxants and painkillers. These are as effective as shooting Superman with a bb gun.
Before she left for the office on Thursday last, Mrs.Rootchopper’s suggested I use some of her major league medications. She had these as a reward for being run over by an SUV. The painkiller is dilaudid. It is seven times more powerful than morphine. I know this because her doctors told us that several times. (How the heck did they come up with that number anyway. Do they have a pain-o-meter someplace?) She also suggested I try an anti-inflamatory called Mobic. These little suckers are powerful. They helped reduce the swelling in her legs overnight. My back is apparently from Krypton because neither of these medicines had the slightest effect whatsoever on me. Except for the fact that the dilaudid gave me a colossal headache. And one, or both, made me nauseous. My sister-in-law suggested that I eat some ice cream to calm my stomach. Comfort food seemed like a good idea at the time. Not so much. About an hour later, however, I was bowing to the porcelain god. Many offerings later, I fell fast asleep in a painful ball on the floor of the family room..
While all this was going on we were experiencing a record heat wave here in DC. It was something like 105 degrees outside. I’m pretty sure that was Farenheit, but I could be mistaken. In any case, when I awoke it became pretty clear to me that the air conditioner had met its match and shut down. By the time Mrs. Rootchopper came home it was 90 degrees in the house. We’re havin’ fun now!
Day two came and so did the AC repairman (T J Fannon & Sons rocks!). I was still hobbling around like Igor in search of a brain for the monster. By day three the house was back to its normal frigid state and I was still in pain, and brainless. (Master! Master!) On day four I ever so carefully left the house for some social interaction at a cook out for the Bike Friday Club of DC. I drove my New World Accord. It doesn’t fold. They let me in anyway. Along the way I bought a bicycle trainer from my friend Chelli. Carrying it into the house when I got home was big fun. Not.
I went back to work on day five taking a mighty long time to get to and from the car. Fast forward to day eight, which would be today. I was feeling okay when the alarm went off. Still sore to be sure. I decided to ride to work. I rode my Tour Easy recumbent and I am happy to report I made it to and from work without incident. I don’t think the riding made things any worse so I am riding in tomorrow as well.
If you’ve never ridden a recumbent, you should give it a go. Coming down a big hill on mine is more like street luge than biking. It takes a little getting used to. The view from the seat is very different from a conventional bike. Especially when the fairing is a scratched up mess. Check it out.
Without the Tour Easy I would not have been able to ride. To ride this bike properly without messy your knees up, you have to spin at a high rate against a low gear. The spinning motion was kind to my back. As was the big foam cushion of a seat. It’s good to be back on a bike. Tomorrow may hit 100 degrees again. This time I’ll be off the floor and on the bike.
Anybody got a brain they want to sell?